Parenting with Love & Logic by Foster Cline & Jim Fay

We both just finished Foster Cline and Jim Fay's Parenting With Love And Logic and have taken up several of his recommendations. The core idea that we have latched onto is to let the children have their SLOs (significant learning opportunities) while the price tag is still relatively small. We are working on implementing more L&L (Love & Logic) moments into our parenting routines.

Here are a few sample L&L conversations from our home.

Me: I notice that there's a lot of your stuff around the house. Would you like to pick it up or would you like me to?
Child: (running) I'll do it. I'll do it. If you do it, you'll put it in jail.
Me: Yup.

Dandy: Mom I broke a dish.
Me: Anyone hurt?
Dandy: No.
Me: Okay. You know how to clean it up. I like to wear shoes for that sort of work because I hate cutting my feet.
Dandy: I'll be careful.
Me: Even when I am careful I sometimes get cut. That's why I wear shoes.
Dandy: I won't get cut.
Me: Okay, but if you do, who is going to clean up the blood and wash your poor feet and put on band-aids?
Dandy: Me. I will.
Me: Okay.
(sweeping sounds)
Dandy: OUCH!
(scurrying-to-first-aid-kit sounds)

I check to make sure it is not life-threatening; it is not.

(time passes)
Dandy: I got the blood stopped. (shows 7 band-aids on one small cut)
Me: Okay. Don't forget the blood on the floor from the kitchen to the bathroom.
Dandy: Would it be okay if I put shoes on first and then clean up the blood?
Me: Sure. Good idea.

Come to think of it, the incident of the unchanged underwear was an L&L situation too. I just hadn't read the book yet.

Parenting With Love And Logic has helped me keep my cool. I don't sing the little uh-oh song they feature, but I do keep that attitude. I identify a problem the child is facing and I give some advice, but I don't pick up the problem and start carrying it for them. This has really helped me stay in my happy place, which is good for all of us.